I'm not alone in this boat

Today I'm going to take a brief break from sharing our adventures. I have had a few things rolling around my heart that I really want to remember. 

I know we all have seasons in our lives that feel like we are moving from one storm to another. Quite honestly if someone asked me what the last year and a half has been like. I would say horrible. I'm not just talking little thunder claps. I have felt like we have lived in one big hurricane! 

I'm not going to go into all the details, though I did write about this once on our other blog.

And here we are again, coming out of that storm and into what appears to be another right on the horizon. I learned before about the faithfulness of God in the midst of challenges we face. I appreciate that I can claim Romans: 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

I know storms are a part of life. Part of our existence in this imperfect fallen world.

 But, I can't help but admit that this transition, this new storm, has also taken its toll on me both Emotionally and Spiritually. We are yet another cross country move later, facing  a whole host of challenges that an expanding family faces when they leave their familiar surroundings. And I can't help but wonder why things are just as hard as before? Albeit in different ways, but still very hard. I was beginning to doubt this was the path God wanted us to take after all. But, of course that is what the enemy wants us to do isn't it? Doubt.


One major blessing down here comes in the form of a radio station, who happens to play sermons by David Jeremiah of Shadow Mountain Community Church nearly every evening as I cook dinner. I cannot help but believe it is no accident that lately he seems to be speaking  about things which are extremely applicable to our lives right now. One message in particular high-lighted a passage of scripture I had already been meditating on.   

   It is Mark 4:35-41
The heading in my bible reads:
   Jesus Calms the Storm

³⁵ That day when evening came, he said to his disciples, “Let us go over to the other side.” ³⁶ Leaving the crowd behind, they took him along, just as he was, in the boat. There were also other boats with him. ³⁷ A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped. ³⁸ Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and said to him, “Teacher, don’t you care if we drown?”

³⁹ He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Quiet! Be still!” Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.

⁴⁰ He said to his disciples, “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?”

⁴¹ They were terrified and asked each other, “Who is this? Even the wind and the waves obey him!”

Now, commonly when I read this particular passage I notice two things. One, the disciples were in a storm, and they cried out to Jesus to save them.  And Jesus had mercy on their poor scared souls and calmed the storm. (Check, I have been doing that for months it seems. And he is faithful to either bring the storms in my life to an end for however brief a time or see me through them.)
The second thing that always strikes me is that Jesus didn't stop the storm until they asked. I know I always try to manage for a while in my own strength before I break down in desperation and ask for Gods help. I don't know why, but I do...Yes, I am working on that.

But in that period of time when I'm trying to figure things out I always have these nagging wonderings. Why me? Hey, I'm human, and I wonder sometimes why. The last two years especially. So, much has happened that made me sure we were walking in Gods will, and we have received so much blessing.  
Only to have what seemed like the polar opposite happen next. Beginning with our unexpected move back to Michigan, and an extremely hard year that followed, and ending in my husband, injured and unable to do the work he had always done there. Talk about a scary storm. Yet, God never left us, He faithfully healed Kyle and provided a new job albeit 900 miles from Michigan and again He worked out every detail.
And so we moved, yet still even with that storm behind me I feel like we are in a whole other storm. This one not as severe, but still I would love to catch my breath for just a moment. 
 I confess its in these moments when I'm trying to breath from one storm to another that I always feel the most confused. Along with the why question, I find myself wondering... Did we navigate that last storm right? Did we obey and follow the path God presented? I think I prayed it through, didn't I? I was listening, wasn't I? Did we make a mistake, because it sure looks like another storm is brewing? Or is this the same storm? 
I could go on, but I don't think it is necessary, you get the idea. I have doubts sometimes...(now here I just hope I'm not the only person who has ever asked such questions.)


So, were does that leave things? Oh yes. So the other day I was mulling over this particular scripture in Mark when this sermon comes on. And answered my most burning question of the day. Which was: Did we really follow Gods leading to come down here? And do you know what I heard and realized? Jesus said to the disciples:   “Let us go over to the other side.” 


I cant believe I missed this all along. Jesus said to go. Now what happens next is just as important. "³⁶ Leaving the crowd behind, they took him along, just as he was, in the boat. There were also other boats with him."
The "they" being the disciples took Jesus and left.   
They didn't hesitate or mull around the weather conditions. They went as directed with Jesus and STILL they found themselves in the midst of a storm. 


(I know this may be elementary for most of you, but gosh was this awfully significant for me.)  


Even when we are living in Gods will we can still find ourselves in some stormy waters. 


And while this is significant what happens next is even more important.
^"36 Leaving the crowd behind, they took him [Jesus] along, just as he was, in the boat."  Jesus was in the boat. AND he was even comfy enough to take a nap! 


Now we all know the little scolding he gave the disciples for lacking in faith. After all He the Son of God did say, lets go to the other side, which would imply that they would get there. But I think it is also important to note that he still had understanding for them. and calmed the waters. 
And even in the midst of our current life storms, I can honestly say I do feel the waters calming. I will admit though, just a week ago I was hitting my knees crying to God the, "Are you going to let us drown?" prayer.


I thank the Lord that he sent this reminder, that He is in my boat and my families boats as well (see vs. 36 "There were also other boats with him.") and we will get to the other side.  

Yes, there will be more storms, but I hope and pray I will approach the next one with a little more faith. Maybe, maybe not, but I think I've got the concept rolling.

My prayer: Lord, I pray this post blesses someone as learning this lesson has surely blessed me. Thank you for being in my boat. -Amen.